On 8th March 2020, schools in Dubai closed as part of the bid to stem the spread of Covid-19 in the UAE. Offices shut shortly after, on March 29th (although by that point many people were already, to use the digital parlance, #WFH). When lockdown hit Leo was seven and in Year 2, Fox was five and in FS2 (equivalent to reception in the UK) and Kit was three and in FS1 (nursery in the UK). It became immediately clear that distance learning has its limitations for three-year-olds (and that’s putting it politely). Fox is able to engage and plod through his phonics and maths, but he requires constant supervision - leave him for one second and he’s off and finding anything other than schoolwork to do. Leo, at seven, is far more independent and able to get on with the work set by her teacher alone.
Five-year-old Fox making himself useful as a wind machine special effects provider for when Zoom calls go EXTRA
Now that we are on the other side and the kids are safely ensconced back in school I have vowed never, ever to contemplate a career swerve to education. But for when the dreaded email arrives indicating a positive in case in class and subsequent shift to temporary online learning, here are my main takeaways from ‘the awfulness’:
Go with the flow. Home school is not a hill I choose to die on. Some days the kids are phonics-fantastic superstars. Some days they have more attitude than Kevin the Teenager. Don’t fight it.
All our pre-Covid iPad restrictions have gone right out of the window. And that’s okay. But if they are going to be on the damn things all day, try to make sure they are content they are accessing is where you want to be in terms of education and life views. We banned and deleted YouTube (the unboxing pit of doom is endless) and removed Netflix, which they can watch on the big TV while remaining at least vaguely connected to external human contact. Load ‘em up with the likes of Reading Eggs instead. At weekends the rules are softened and they can have Minecraft and Kit’s beloved Thomas & Friends.
Zoom calls: Kids. Scheduling three kids’ Zoom calls is a frickin’ nightmare. Especially when they throw virtual playdates into the mix (and then go all shy and barely speak). The only way to survive is to get organised and make a weekly chart with timings, access codes and passwords. It’s taken me weeks to accept that this is how it has to be. Weeks of panicked searching through inboxes and Seesaw and passive aggressive ‘discussions’ with Andrew when a child missed a session. However now that I have succumbed to the chart, I have to admit that life is easier. The playdates are still a waste of time though.
Zoom calls: Adults. When I jumped on a 9pm call with a couple of very, very smart people (in the intelligence rather than the sartorial sense), blithely assuming no one would put video on at that time of night, I was blindsided when they did. Having gone peak feral, I had to quickly decide between appearing rude and keeping my own video off or styling it out and hoping that they didn’t question the alarming vision of Waynetta Slob on their screens (yes, that is two Harry Enfield references in one post).
Just Dance should be on the curriculum. Yet another reason why I will never be welcomed to, nor indeed apply to work in, mainstream education.